The Beautiful Game
The World Cup is over and the domestic leagues have started again in earnest, but in the spirit of this fantastic event Bush Guru would like to draw a parallel between overpaid playacting footballers and members of the bush society of deadly creatures. You’ve seen them; the footballers who get a slight touch (or in some cases not at all) and go down like someone has shot them in the middle of their face. Referees need to be aware of these fakers, but if you’re in the bush one also has to keep an eye open…
The Rinkhal is a leading culprit in faking injury or death in the snake world. It might be half turned over on its side looking to all the world like a fully deceased former member of the serpent community, but they can rear up and bite you with a particularly nasty neurotoxin (happily mixed in with some cytotoxic venom). With snakes the rule of thumb is don’t pick up a dead snake. Or you might end up without a thumb.
So, if you are highly paid professional footballer in the public eye and you are reading this, remember one thing: the next time you get touched on the ankle and you go down holding your face in excruciating pain, it could be a lot worse…
(This article doesn’t in any way apply to Xavi Alonso in the World Cup final. That kung fu kick was more like a honey badger attack.)